babyferaligator:

how many gummy vitamins do i need to eat to kill myself

I was just taking Rorschach tests online (as one does) but one of them was a fake one that scares you with a scream and a scary picture but instead of the exorcist or something it was just a picture of michael jackson um

p-unny:

*tumblr user who wants more notes voice*  guise srsly stop reblogging this

anonynaila:

subvertcliche:

mello-dramatic:

Everyone who reblogs this will get the title of a book to read based on their bio/posts.

Everyone. I mean it.

THIS IS THE BEST POST

I HAVE EVER SEEN

EVER

they really do mean everyone

kingschultzies:

♫ im on the highway to heck ♫

edating:

yes ur allowed to have other friends u just have to love me more

miss-doctorwho:

stantanalopez:

i was looking through all of my old documents on my computer and i stumbled across a really long one with 25 pages and i read the wHOLE THING and when i got to the very end

i saw this

so i got excited and looked underneath my mattress but instead i found this

why

wow past you was a bitch

unsuccessfulmetalbenders:

my talents include sleeping eating and thinking of a good comeback two hours after someone has said something rude to me

calciumwaves:

IT’S ALMOST MIDNIGHT AND THERE WAS A KNOCK AT MY DOOR SO I CAUTIOUSLY OPENED THE DOOR THEN TWO DRUNKEN GUYS SHOUTED “SURPRISE” THEN LOOKED AT ME FOR A MOMENT AND WENT “FUCK WE’RE AT THE WRONG HOUSE” AND RAN AWAY DOWN THE STREET OH MY GOD

nayx:

if you are grabbed from behind, here are some helpful self defense tips.  fart